42 years young and starting to get it!!

Here's another sporadic post and update!

Yesterday was my birthday. I was 42 years young and for the first time in my entire life I left food on my birthday dinner plate. All of the excuses I've used in the past - It's my birthday I can eat what I want - I can't leave food that I've paid money for, what a waste - I don't eat out often so I'm eating everything while I can - held absolutely no 'weight' last night. The menu was very ordinary so I went with a chicken parma that only came with salad and chips. 1/2 a parma, a dozen chips and 2 slices of garlic bread later I was full. AND I DIDN'T KEEP EATING!! I pushed my plate away and even passed on the cheese platter for dessert!!! And you know what?? I didn't feel one pang of angst that I had left food behind or not taken up the opportunity to have cheese. I felt in control. I'm not going to starve, I'm not never going to taste a good blue again. I will get the opportunity to have another parma. It was the biggest lightbulb moment I've had so far. I was kinda expecting a huge fanfare with each of my lightbulb moments, you know, streamers and confetti falling from the ceiling and a brass band playing, but the quiet, personal acknowledgement is all the fanfare I need. I'm getting it, finally :)

Tomorrow is weigh in day, stay tuned :)

shell xoxo